Introductory Letter

January 27, 2006

Axl Rose
c/o Merck Mercuriadis
75 9th Ave # 2R
New York, NY 10011

Dear Axl,

I’m writing to ask you to perform at my wedding.

I realize this is an audacious request. You’re reclusive, you’re loaded, and you could fill up Madison Square Garden tomorrow. You’re at work on “Chinese Democracy,” your new album, which is reportedly the most expensive album ever made. So why should you go out of your way to perform at some annoying fan’s wedding?

I’m a lifelong Guns ‘N Roses fan. I listened to dubbed versions of the Use Your Illusion tapes on the bus in middle school, when my parents wouldn’t let me buy the store versions because they had the Parental Advisory sticker on them. I’ve bought every album Guns N’ Roses has ever put out, including The Spaghetti Incident. I consider “Get in the Ring” one of the greatest pump-up songs of all time, “Breakdown” one of the most underrated songs of all-time, “Mama Kin” (your version) one of the best rock-out songs of all time.

And also, Axl, I’ve paid my dues. I had tickets to see Guns N’ Roses perform in San Jose and Sacramento at New Years in 2002, but the tour was canceled and I was left out to dry. A lot of your fans were left out to dry—one of my best friends was at the Philadelphia show where you didn’t come out and had to wade through a riot to get home. We hear snippets about a new album, a song on the Da Vinci Code soundtrack, performances in Vegas and Brazil, but mostly we feel ignored. We’re here when you want us, screwed when you don’t.

Honestly, that’s fine. It’s your life. But would there be a better way for you to jumpstart the new incarnation of Guns N’ Roses than by performing at a fan’s wedding, taking a dance or two with grandma, drinking a couple glasses of champagne, and vanishing into the night? It would pretty much be the greatest PR move in the history of civilization, and would immediately endear you and the band to millions of fans. Especially me. It’s not a conventional approach, but it’ll sell a lot of records, and be an infinitely cool thing to do.

I’ve started a website to drum up support for my request. I encourage you to visit http://getaxlforourwedding.blogspot.com to learn about our plans, read my petition, and view some kick ass pictures of yourself.

We’re planning the wedding for July. I’ll be writing regularly until I hear from you.

Best,

Matt Stewart